This week in crypto saw a record amount of bitcoin dumped by investors, causing them to miss out on a rally. On-chain indicators showed signs of a bitcoin bull market, while Ethereum’s deflation rate briefly surpassed 5%. In under a month, Bitcoin added nearly 1 million non-zero addresses. USDC regained its $1 peg as US regulators assured Silicon Valley Bank depositors that they could access their money. An Argentinian bitcoiner claimed that BTC could surpass gold as a trading commodity, and Nomura predicted that the US Fed was done with interest rate hikes.

In banking news, regulators closed Signature Bank two days after closing Silicon Valley Bank in a massive collapse affecting billions in deposits. HSBC acquired the UK subsidiary of Silicon Valley Bank. NatWest imposed a monthly crypto exchange payment limit of $6,000, while Anchorage Digital laid off 75 employees or roughly 20% of its workforce. Crypto companies were moving their money from banks to asset managers.

In exchange news, Binance halted UK deposits and withdrawals. The US government demanded the Voyager-Binance.US’ $1 billion deal to be halted but was refused. Binance confirmed plans to convert $1 billion worth of BUSD to native cryptoassets, while Coinbase proceeded with the planned suspension of BUSD trading. Coinbase confirmed it had around $240 million in corporate cash balance with Signature Bank.

In regul-legisla-legal news, the UK will ramp up oversight of the crypto sector with separate reporting in tax forms. The US SEC Chair reiterated that tokens using staking mechanisms could be considered securities, while the US DoJ probed two major trading firms about plans for a potential bailout of TerraUSD. A Russian lawmaker called for crypto mining legalization, while the US SEC charged an exiled Chinese business tycoon with crypto-related fraud. The US DoJ and Europol took down crypto mixer ChipMixer, and Spanish football clubs were suing crypto sponsors.

In miscellaneous news, DeFiance Capital raised $100 million for its liquid token fund, and Cathie Wood’s Ark Investment raised more than $16 million for two new private crypto funds. South Korea said North Korea’s crypto hacking campaign might be impervious to international sanctions, Euler Finance fell victim to a flash loan attack resulting in $200 million stolen, and two top Brazilian professional football players claimed they had fallen foul of a crypto scam. Meta discontinued NFTs on Facebook and Instagram, while El Salvador launched university courses in Bitcoin and Lightning Network development.

As always, some carefully selected jokes were included, along with a discussion topic and a haiku.